i see something in you ... OPEN!?

[emelia automne tanner]

How would she be able to say those words to him? How could she say that she didn’t love him, not even after this after how she broke down because of what she had done to him? She loved a man named Madden Greyson, she had fallen in love with him and Sebastian was just an old flame. She did love Sebastian, maybe that was what made her react this way. She cried in his chest and shook her head when he had said that love conquered all, because no matter how much he loved her she didn’t love him back. She loved Madden, and the little amount of time she had known him for didn’t matter to her. She loved him, and that was the truest of things she knew. She wanted to tell him that they were still young, what did they know about each other now at such a young age?

Eme knew if she said anything about that then he would use that to ask how she knew she loved Madden the way that she did. She wouldn’t be able to tell him anything at that so she didn’t say anything but only tried to stop her tears. Then when he kissed her, it felt like home. It felt like he had screamed out welcome home to her brain, it felt like it was so right but she knew that it wasn’t. Not with them, not anymore. Although this had registered in her head, she didn’t stop him, instead she kissed him back and her hands were around his neck and she stood on her toes. She pressed her body against him, wanting to feel the way they fit together still like two pieces of a puzzle.

Minutes had to have passed before she pulled away from him and took a few steps back; trying to get away from him she shook her head. “No, this isn’t right…” She touched her lips softly and sighed. “I wish I could tell you things weren’t the way they are—but I love him Seb. I loved you, I did, but to go forward in my life I can’t go backwards too… I’m really sorry…” With that she turned her back to him and closed her eyes, sighing for a moment before she began to walk away. The tears had come back at that point and she struggled to keep them from falling. She didn’t understand why she felt this way; she didn’t understand why she hurt so badly after telling Sebastian this. They broke up two years ago, why did she feel this way?

[sebastian alexander rowyn]

Sebastian felt that he'd won. Eme was kissing him back, she was definitely kissing him back. And she seemed to be enjoying herself. Sebastian couldn't help but get into now, he pressed her body to his and slowly deepened the kiss. He didn't want to push her, but he wanted it like it was. Sebastian didn't want to be afraid of her walking away anymore. All responsibilities aside he figured this would probably be his last chance. He couldn't screw it up.

The male frowned as Eme pulled herself away from him. That was it, he couldn't take it. He needed to scream at her to stop the bullshit, he needed to hear she loved him still. He wanted to shake Madden Greyson out of her head. Sebastian needed Eme in his life, she was his anchor. "Don't go." He said for maybe the fifth time since she'd shown up. The male didn't know what he'd do if she left now. She couldn't leave after that. Couldn't she feel anything?

"You can't keep lying to yourself." The male called after her, he wasn't going to chase her. He didn't have the energy anymore, she'd drained him after everything. "I know you felt what I did just now, Eme." A fresh set a tears threatened his vision as he stood watching her walk away. She just needed to look at him one last time and he'd know she really did love him still, that she was lying to herself and Madden. The thought of Madden almost made him puke, he couldn't stand him.

[emelia automne tanner]

Emelia wanted to turn around and tell him that yes, she had felt something, she wanted to turn around and kiss him again just to see what would happen. To see how it would make her feel, if it would make her feel something true, not something because she missed him and felt bad; but she wouldn’t. She continued walking away from him and quickened her pace, she looked back at him when she was at least thirty feet away from him. “I’m not lying to myself!” She called out to him, almost like it was something friendly not something that he probably wouldn’t take well to hearing. She pushed her hair behind her eyes and sighed.

“I love him, Sebastian, not you.” At that statement Eme had to wonder exactly how true it was, was it so true that every word of it was one hundred percent? Was it half true? Was there at all any truth in the statement? Yes of course she loved Madden, it was just now that Sebastian was here and she had broken down that she doubted it. Because she was weak, if she wasn’t weak she would be steady on her course. Madden was the man in her life now, and for a long time she was sure he would be. Longer than her and Sebastian, she was sure of that. “Goodbye.” Her voice was loud enough so that he would hear her through the distance between them. Turning her back she walked away, finally getting herself out of this situation.

She wanted to go to Madden right then and collapse into his arms. She wanted to fall into his kiss and tell him everything. She had to tell him everything; she couldn’t keep something like this from him. She would tell him everything of it, so long as he wanted to hear everything. If he told her to stop she would, she just didn’t want this to be the elephant in the room between them like the ‘I Love You’ had been for her and Sebastian. She absently reached for herself and called Madden, three rings later he answered and she nervously told him she was coming home.